not knowing you (not trying to). being alone (& cold). trying to drown in a bubble bath (closed-space, no oxygen). being good at disappearing. hiding my face in a giant scarf (it’s hard to breathe without somebody). drawing constellations on my bruised legs with dirty ink. scratching my body with royal blue nails (blood and skin underneath). bones not showing. trying to escape reality. dreaming of you selling lollipops. waking up with shaking hands.